July 14, 2012
Mass Pro-Romney Rally in Beijing
BEIJING (The Borowitz Report) – After a brutal week in which he was booed by the NAACP and grilled by the media, Republican presidential choice Mitt Romney got some support from an unlikely place today: Beijing.
Manufacturing workers from across China flooded downtown Beijing to show their gratitude for Mr. Romney’s robust record of job creation in China while at the helm of the private equity firm Bain Capital.
While Mr. Romney’s feats of outsourcing have taken a political toll at home, they have made him a national hero in China, according to workers like Qiu Huang, who attended the rally.
“I owe my job to Mitt Romney, and so do many of my friends and family members,” he said. “His record as a job creator, in China at least, is second to none.”
Mr. Qiu said that if Mr. Romney ran for President of China, “he’d win in a landslide – he wouldn’t even need those billionaire brothers to buy ads for him.”
But the Chinese worker was surprised to learn that Mr. Romney had spent the better part of the week denying that he still worked at Bain during the company’s frenzy of outsourcing jobs to China.
“Why would you deny doing a great thing like that?” he asked. “That would be like denying you gave people healthcare.” Get a free subscription to the Borowitz Report here.